Friday, September 15, 2006

Nowhere, Nothing and No One

I started to clear my leave on Monday afternoon. So far I haven’t done anything of any real significance. I have been getting up late, surfing the net, reading novels and sometimes just to break the monotony of my life, I do weights and running.

The Weighty Issue

It seems no matter how much I run or exercise my weight remains a constant. You know I been trying to lose my big ass for years. I know, I said it myself, slowly but surely. I wish I hadn’t said it because it’s really taking an awfully long time and I am starting to get impatient. Yet somehow I know I will never reach the point of breaking frustration.

Actually I am pretty happy that I managed to cut down my weight from 98kg to 76kg all by myself. Why I was so heavy I cannot recall but all that matters now is to keep working out to atleast maintain my weight.

Absent Friends
It seems that my friends are too busy to entertain me these days. They are either studying, or aboard, or working, or cleaning their rooms. Even my brother isn’t at home to entertain me with his theatrics.

Everyone seems so busy, no time for friends. I am guessing someone will call me out after reading my post just to cheer me up. Hey I am not looking for attention it’s just been too long I seen some of their faces.

It doesn’t matter, when I eventually go, no one really gonna miss me. Maybe my brother will. But its different he’s family.

Serious It’s just a Healthy Obsession
Just because you folks don’t read, don’t label me as a bookworm. It’s just a healthy obsession that serves only to implore my mind with ideas and notions on how the world ought to have worked or works or work.

1) Rereading Watchmen
2) American Gods
3) Stardust Graphic Novel
4) The Sandman Companion
5) The Briefer History of Time

We make our own Hells
No matter what, I can’t seem to get mad at myself. I always keep telling myself, that it just a passing cloud, things will get better and all those things you say to yourself to give you hope.

Even when things look the bleakest, I will wake up the next day and start the day without conceding to pain that I should be feeling.

Life goes on. One cannot be mad at himself all the time. I guess that is why I believe we make our own hells. I live in my own kind of hell. The one in which only I know its depth.

And Yes, I know, I am a blog whore.

So till my next post ya, its bye from Ganz.

1 Comments:

Blogger Ganz said...

Hmm… the gals, Nah. They can always find another guy. Someone smarter, more good looking then I am. But I doubt they can find someone like me. Haha.

Anyway thanks for the reassurance. Now I have to leave without telling you. lol.

9/16/2006 1:35 am

 

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